NAVIGATING THROUGH THE PAIN OF REJECTION
The brave and confident woman is typically up to some BIG things. Which means she stopped playing it safe and got out of her comfort zone. And guess what happens when we jump into the fire? Sometimes we can get burnt! Bad reviews, hurtful feedback, break-ups and blow-offs – a risk-taking woman feels rejection like we all do.
Rejection is almost like a physical punch to the gut or a slap on the face – AND, she is ready to take it on, because the warrior woman responds by strengthening her mind and her body. She builds her personal armor to withstand rejection, as she rises up to greet the life of her dreams. Here’s how you can do it too.
Develop thick skin
The first thing a confident woman learns is to toughen up! She may hear comments about herself she doesn’t like, or get rejected by a social group she was hoping to join, but her first principle is not to take anything personally. Feedback is information, not “truth”. It is neither good nor bad, and it only has the value and power she chooses to give it. If it’s valid she can learn and grow from it. If not, move on!
Clear your mind
She stays present, she learns from the situation. Romantic rejection – when we are blown off or get cheated on — can be the most gut-wrenching pain we feel. A warrior woman uses the strength and clearness of her mind over her emotions. Even when it hurts, she continues to analyze and assess what is good for HER. She knows that when love and commitment are not reciprocated, it is no longer a good place to be.
Keep your chin Up
Sitting across from an unsmiling coop or condo board, waiting to get approved for the perfect apartment, she may fear rejection. And yet she knows not to let her uncertainty trip her up. By simply straightening her shoulders and keeping her chin up, she feels the energy and confidence flow back into her body. She keeps in mind that this is not the only home out there for her. So while it’s not ideal, she decides to stop worrying about something she can’t control and focuses on making the best impression she possibly can.
She doesn’t underestimate the importance of breathing. When she didn’t get her dream job or got passed over for a promotion, she doesn’t let the rejection define her. She breathes and realigns with her vision of who she is and where she wants to go. The rejection does not need to be the TRUTH about who YOU are, it is specific to that experience. The warrior woman directs her own truths. Confidence and calmness generate a resilience that allows her to bounce right back.
Lead with your heart
The word courage has roots in the Latin word for heart – “coeur”. You need a strength of heart to take on challenges, including rejection. The warrior woman has made leading with the heart a practice in the game of her life. As she gets her NOs from universities, she doesn’t think it is a catastrophe, that her plans for a good education are no longer possible. You only need ONE YES to move to the next step and it can come from somewhere least expected.
As Marcel Proust so eloquently puts it, “discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” The warrior businesswoman naturally uses her inner eye when faced with rejection. Starting out as an entrepreneur can sometimes feel like an uphill struggle with all the passersby ready to say NO! She reframes the experience in a way that allows her to make lemonade out of the lemons. When one door shuts, another one opens, she uses her new inner eye to find that door to walk through it and achieve her goals.
Using all parts of her body’s armor, the confident woman knows she can take the gut punches and rejections that life always offers to keep going to make her life happen.
This article was first published on www.womenworking.com/profile/leena-roy/